Purple outfits and red hats: Who determines what's age appropriate?

What does it mean to be age-appropriate? Remember the phrase "Act your age, not your shoe size." Your mom said it to shame you into acting more grown-up!

I read recently in a fashion magazine that older women should only wear neutral lipstick. Really! No bright red rouge on the lips? I think "age appropriate" is always someone's interpretation of how another person should act.

So how should we express ourselves as we grow older?

Does aging bring to mind rocking chairs, white hair, polite conversations and thick bifocals? Rachel McAdams, a Canadian actress, says: "I feel like I'm going backward, actually, as I get older. I'm regressing. I feel more and more like a kid, which is kind of a fun feeling."

If aging is genuinely about becoming more of who you really are, with more freedom and confidence, then there should be more diversity in the expression of each Elder.

I say to heck with being age-appropriate.

One of my favorite poems titled Warning," by Jenny Joseph, an English poet, starts: "When I am an old woman I shall wear purple with a red hat that doesn't go and doesn't suit me. And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves and satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter."

Jenny was speaking about this exact topic and she became an inspiration for the Red Hat Society! The group epitomizes the call to fun, friendship and freedom.

Do you have your own set of "rules" about what dress, behaviors and conversation will be like for you as you age? When will you quit wearing red lipstick or colorful clothes?

For some it may be the time to start! Should Elders be neutral in every way? I think just the opposite. The older, the freer!

As Jenny Joseph says, "And make up for the sobriety of my youth." To each their own; more freedom, more expression, more uniqueness.

Gray may be the color of hair, but it is not the color of life!

Find Connie’s book, “Daily Cures: Wisdom for Healthy Aging,” at www.justnowoldenough.com.